Kiss me, I’m Italian

– done reading all released books in George R.R. Martin’s ‘A Song of Ice and Fire’ series!

Honestly, this is why I don’t do t-shirts for a living.

As per usual, I am withholding final judgment of the series until all the books are out (so about 37 years from now?) and I’ve read them all (40ish years from now, based on Martin’s schedule of release dates –  “whenever” – and the number of books he plans to write in this series – “however many I feel like”).

It took the better part of a year to read this book between studying and other things I want to read, but I did finally make it happen. Since this is the newest book (and maybe others will have been as slow as me in getting to the end), I will not spoil tooooo much here.

I appreciated a couple of things about this book that didn’t happen in previous stories – aka stuff actually happened and people weren’t just wandering around aimlessly in the woods/desert/snow/under the sea.

Daenerys actually developed into a person and not just a Mary Sue (more on her in a minute). Tyrion got shit done. Theon tried to get his balls back. Arya is on her way to becoming a full-fledged assassin. Jon was showing signs of becoming a pretty decent leader (future lord of Winterfell?) before he, uh, wasn’t allowed to do so anymore. Jaime and Brienne are together again!…probably going to be killed by Zombie!Catelyn, but I’m willing to overlook this. Bran was mostly absent (hooray!).

We had some new perspectives in this book – Barristan Selmy (who I really like especially now that he’s a political schemer) and (I think) Asha Greyjoy (who I also really like).  Quentyn Martell too, although he didn’t make it to the end, and I felt really sorry for him.

Can I make a complaint though? George R.R. Martin gets all this praise for writing women very well, and in a lot of cases, I agree. Cersei, Arya, and Asha are all gutsy, well written, interesting. Sansa…eh, she’s getting there.

Then there’s our dear Khaleesi. She has her moments, I grant you. When she freed the slaves and had the dragons burn the slave masters? I shivered a little.

HOWEVER.

She’s about 13 when she is first introduced. By the end of this book, she is about 15.

How much sex does a 15 year old girl REALLY think about having? Or actually have?

Was I unique in not having ridiculously elaborate sexual fantasies in my early teens? I don’t know. But Daenerys seems to be much more sexually developed than most girls in their early teens seem to be, even in this fantasy series. I get she’s a queen and yada yada, but Sansa and Arya were also in their early-mid teens by the end of book 5 and didn’t have these same things.

Further, I was relieved that some stuff started going wrong for her. I like her, and in my own way I’m kind of rooting for her, but who conquers the fucking world without encountering a problem doing it? Especially as a teenager. I KNOW she has dragons, but until recently the dragons weren’t good for much except making kebobs.

Anyway, I had the same problem I have with the last couple of books. I don’t see where the story is going. Granted, I’ve read some really elaborate theories online – this Song of Ice & Fire/Norse Mythology theory being one of the best thought out and complicated – but it feels like we’re not really getting anywhere. I would like some definitive event where I say to myself, “OH, I GET IT NOW.”

There MAY have been one at the very end, but it’s hard to tell. I’ll say this though: I like Lord Varys a lot and always have.

Excited about the next one.

Tagged: authors: george r.r. martin, books: a dance with dragons, books: song of ice and fire series, genre: fantasy